According to the Mayan Calendar, the Austin comedy world is going to end in a few short days. We decided to use this opportunity to announce ambitious plans for 2013, because we won’t end up actually having to follow through on any of this. It’s the perfect crime! We look good. The world ends. And then we don’t actually have to put in any work to entertain you.

You can buy tickets for these shows in advance, or if you’re feeling lucky you can purchase a 2013 GOLDEN TICKET, which puts you on a special list to get into any show all year long. GOLDEN TICKET holders can show up to any regular show all year long and get VIP treatment (a bag of delicious popcorn).* GOLDEN TICKETS stop going on sale January 15th, and there’s a limited number.

ColdTowne Theater is Austin’s only entertainment option, with improv, sketch and stand up shows seven nights a week, featuring local Emmy award wining talent, the hardest working moms in show business.

More below the cut…

2013 Season Preview
DADs in Bars
Saturdays, 8:30pm
A new spin on one of our favorite formats, the Armando! Improv comedy troupe Precious Dads recruits Austin’s favorite mixologists to tell true stories from their days in the service industry and then uses those stories to improvise comedy scenes. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever seen in a bar? These guys can probably beat that.

Sci-Fi Saturdays
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Directed by the P! Company’s Kyle Sweeney, this show will play with tropes from classic science fiction. Rather than a cheap parody, this show will be an homage to everything you love about science fiction filtered through the warped satirical brains of ColdTowne’s best improv talent.

Dating Game!
Thursdays at 8:30pm
ColdTowne Theater’s finest bring you a month of valentine’s day shenanigans with a live version of the dating game. Everyone who shows up will most definitely get to interact awkwardly with a member of the opposite sex. (Or same sex, as the case may be).

TGIS — Thank God It’s Saturday
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Two back to back improvised 90s sitcoms in front of a live studio audience, directed by Cody Dearing. An homage to the awesome/awful ABC Friday night line ups that included Full House, Family Matters and Perfect Strangers. What will the situations be? You get to decide.

Texas BBQ Cook-off Show (Untitled)
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Directed by Erika May (The Frank Mills), this documentary film-style improv show centers around a small Texas town’s BBQ cook off contest. Inspired by the movies of Christopher Guest, strange personalities will compete against each other in an epic, life or death struggle over slow cooked meats.

Austin Sketch Fest
Memorial Day Weekend
Last year’s sketch fest brought in people from all over the country and Paul F. Tompkins! We’re cooking up some big time headliners for this year, so get ready!


Improv Fantasy League!
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Our signature Summer event returns. Veteran comedic talent will be drafted alongside our improv students to compete against each other in a month long improv tournament that features live commentary, free agents and pre-show tailgating.

Indiana Jones Stunt Spectacular!
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Stunts, sword fights and stereotypes! Everything you loved about Indiana Jones Stunt Spectaculars minus the damned Crystal Skulls — in other words, plenty of whips and explosions. Directed by Cody Dearing.

Stag Comedy Presents: Stab Comedy!
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Austin’s #1 Sketch Group, Stag Comedy presents a Halloween themed sketch comedy show. Featuring members of Master Pancake Theater, Mascot Wedding Productions, and The Andrew and Matt show; Stag Comedy presents a seamless mix of live and video sketches that are sure to bring a smile to your face and frowns to the faces of your many, many enemies.

Stag Comedy performs regularly around Austin, TX and have performed at Austin Sketch Fest, ImprovBoston’s Geek Week, Frontera Fest, the Milwaukee Comedy Festival, and will perform at this year’s Out of Bounds Festival.

Your Terrific Neighbors
Saturdays, 8:30pm
Austin’s #1 Sketch Group, Your Terrific Neighbors presents a month long run of comedy and jokes. Your Terrific Neighbors have appeared all over Austin — at ColdTowne, SVT, The Hideout and at the ND — and are the official sketch group of the Encyclopedia Show!